Friday, February 11, 2011

Back to Life, Back to Reality

Back to life, back to the present time,
Back from a fantasy yeah
Tell me now, take the initiative

Today I looked at this blog and saw that I had a "goal" to lose 10 pounds by my 47th birthday but instead of losing I've gained 4.5 pounds since November 30th. What am I thinking? Oh yeah....I'm not thinking about losing weight at all....and THAT is the problem!

Yesterday I watched Jennifer Hudson on Oprah. That girl has lost 80 pounds! If I could do that I would not be in a size 6 like she is but I would be a much happier person. I would be wearing a size 12 and I'm serious when I say that I'd be happy to wear a size 16 so a 12 would be awesome.

So today it's back to life, back to reality, back from the fantasy. I actually logged into WW today and tracked my breakfast before I even ate it. It kept me focused on what I should really eat this morning.

I can do this. I'm still considering joining Overeaters Anonymous and also having a lap band procedure. I have to check with my doctor as I have some other health issues going on but if my insurance will cover it and if my body can really handle it then I think I want to do it.

I know someone who had that or gastric bypass but didn't tell anyone. Weird huh? But they're not very open about their lives to begin with. Oh they like to know the dirt in everyone else's life but they don't want to share their own dirt!!! Anyway...the person was thin in their younger years and then gained a lot of weight, tried to get it off and then one day started to lose weight. There was exercising involved and not as many calories taken in but when you watched them you just knew that it wasn't because they'd chosen to lose weight but because they couldn't eat more than a few bites at a time.

I wondered why they wouldn't want to share their surgery but never questioned them about it. Even to this day, many years later they don't "fess up" about the surgery. They must feel like it's a weakness or something to have stooped to surgery but I say, "More power to ya" for taking control in whatever way you had to! And I know it must be awesome to wear "normal" sizes again. we go again.


  1. Yay! Rennie . . . I know you can do this. You'll be incredible.

  2. That is one of my favorite songs. Are you sure it was surgery? Honestly kids in high school thought I had surgery and it really ticked me off. I worked my butt off literally and lost 100! :) My cousin had a funny experience at the Dr's recently as well. She does OA, lost 180 on her own. The Dr thought she had surgery. Did you read her blog? If not, here is her link: Her initial stories are at the beginning so you have to drill back. I have new goals, centered around our trip in June. SIGH such a challenge. We can do it!

  3. Thanks for your vote of confidence Heidi!

  4. Sarah...we can do it! I checked out OA meetings near me and I'm going to a meeting next week near me.

  5. Rennie, there was a lady in my ward growing up who was pretty heavy. Then one day she was just noticeably thinner and thinner until I thought she looked great! (she was about 55??) My dad knew (how?) that she walked. She watched what she ate and she walked several miles a day. That's it. She probably lost 70-90 pounds doing this. It took a while but she NEVER gained it back. I think walking(or biking, my mom does that) would be something that wouldn't hurt like other forms of exercise. Remember, you burn about 100 calories a mile no matter how fast or slow you go.

    You can do it!!!!